When my three years old son started to walk, he showed a severe limp. Fortunately, it was totally corrected after a tedious treatment –my wife had to bond his little legs to a metal artifact every night for many months. I remember feeling very depressed those days.
I didn’t know it at the time but, now that I see Juanpi running like Speedy Gonzalez all around, I feel relief and grateful, and I realize that the main factor that depressed me was the feeling of guilt.
Feeling guilty for your own genetics is crazy. There is nothing useful about it. I know that now. I like how my friend Josh, a great writer and blogger, clearly puts it:
“In my talk I mentioned that when my son began having tics I felt an irrational sense of guilt. I ruined him. It’s my fault. He’s imperfect because of my genetics. Many parents of kids with disabilities approached me afterward and said “thank you. We have felt the exact same way.” To them, and to myself: it’s not our fault. Every parent probably feels some responsibility for their kid’s challenges, but there’s nothing useful about blaming ourselves for their genetics. What’s done is done. How will we help them move forward
He also gives lectures on the subject for which he gets very well paid and gets to travel many parts in USA. He is planning to give away three Speaking Engagements for 2012. If you are interested in having Josh as a lecturer (totally recommended) follow this link.